Boys: Walking the Walk and Talking the Talk, By Haley B.

Boys

Walking the Walk and Talking the Talk

By Haley B.

I hate the thought of boys. Honestly. It makes me sick to think about guys anymore period. The reason being is because it’s what I’ve struggled with my entire life. I mean, I have a deep testimony that maybe one day I’ll share but guys are where it comes down to fighting the real battle Satan has in front of us... well for me it is.

Guys want us to look this way and act that way and be the total Christian girl in front of their parents but when they get us alone, it’s a whole different story. It’s so confusing sometimes, not being ourselves and getting caught in the trap that Satan has set. If he doesn’t like me or love me for me, then what’s the point of being with him? There isn’t, and that is what stinks, and is confusing sometimes.

We get to the point of “being in love” with him but yet we don’t even realize who we are anymore. Before he came along, spaghetti was our favorite food. Now, it’s cheeseburgers because he doesn’t like spaghetti. We hated sports before that magical guy came and swept us off our feet. Now, that’s all we watch. We lose track of who GOD has made us to be to fit some “perfect” guy’s standards. And that is NOT how it should be.

And the worst part of it all? After the break up, everything whether it be on TV or in real life, reminds you of him. Scents combining together could be the perfect combination of his cologne. It’s amazing how our brain even remembers that...even a year later.

I was with the perfect guy. He was absolutely amazing and would do anything for me. Even though he wasn’t a Christian, I tried to make him one and save him. It ended up not working because in the end, I hurt him worse than anyone ever could. His father hated me anyways but that never really played a part in the break up. I cheated on him and not the “I kissed another boy” kind of cheat. This was some serious kind of cheating. I felt horrible for telling him (I waited 2 months to tell him; I didn’t know how he’d react and I was scared.) but I knew it was something I had to do.

We just recently met up for coffee and talked everything out. We had been out of contact for almost a year before we even had closure. How crazy is that? But we did. He moved to another country and I went off to college. It was a crazy ride but I wouldn’t change it because it was just God telling me that I should be equally yoked with someone.

I’ve been in relationships with Christian guys but we always did some not so Christian things. Those relationships were never good ones. They became unhealthy and neither of us was growing in our walk with The Lord.

I have been single for 2 months now for the first time since I was in middle school. (I’m 19 years old now and am in my sophomore year in college.) You can see how this has affected my view on men period but I wouldn’t change it for the world. It has brought me closer to Christ than ever and my walk with The Lord is growing more and more every day. I can honestly say I’m in love with Christ and I wouldn’t have my life turn out any other way.